Some people are misinformed. Some people have no common sense. And some people are just so incredibly clueless that I wonder how they managed to survive into adulthood.
The last patient I admitted last night was a 27-year old woman who was hit by a car. She suffered multiple fractures in her leg, arm, and back. In the heat of the moment, sometimes patients aren't fully informed about the extent of their injuries, so I make it a point to talk to them the next day and make sure they are aware of their situation. So I went to see her this evening, and I told her she had fractures of her back, her tibia, her humerus, and her femur.
"My femur??" she asked wide-eyed. "Am I going to be able to have kids?"
I stared at her blankly for a second while I gathered the strength not to ask her what the FUCK she was talking about.
"Yes ma'am, you can have kids. Your femur is your thigh bone."
"Oh, I though it was a part of the vagina."
No, the thigh bone is not connected to the vagina-bone.
Stories about general surgery, trauma surgery, dumb patients, dumb doctors, and dumb shit from the dumb world around us.
Saturday 28 January 2012
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Maybe she had it confused with Fallopian tube? It's the best I can come up with.
ReplyDeleteI work in the emergency room as a paramedic and last night I almost lost my composure in front of the patients family. The patient had a stroke and the neurologist came to inform the family that the patient was brain dead and that they had to make a
ReplyDeletedecision. The family then stated that they wanted to opt for a BRAIN TRANSPLANT.
A. BRAIN. TRANSPLANT. When the neurologist told them this was not possible, they asked which facility they needed to go to for the surgery. I had to leave the room.
Sounds like one of those moments when you stare in disbelief and think, 'man.. out of millions, this is the sperm that won?' I can't even imagine a sitting room full of them
DeleteI hate every stupid person in the world that thinks their femur is in their vagina and everyone that wants a brain transplant. I understand that you want him to come back, but seriously, how old are we?
ReplyDeleteThis is the best blog ever, seriously! Doc, I came to know you from FML & followed you here. You are quite awesome Sir!!!!! :c)
ReplyDeleteI hthey feeling they got femur confused with feotus
ReplyDeleteThis has made me laugh, giggle then laugh again! Stupidity can really piss me off at times, as much as it has the ability to make me truly thankful it exists
ReplyDeleteMaybe she was thinking fetus and since it's baby-related, she immediately freaked out. She's still stupid, nonetheless.
ReplyDeleteFixed:
ReplyDelete"My femur? Will I be able to gain any intelligence?"
The femur is what makes your a female. Durr.
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure my husband thinks I'm delusional. I'm laughing hilariously while reading..a medical blog. Lol
ReplyDelete