About 2 years ago I was asked to see a guy who had this impacted in his rectum:
Fortunately for him, I was able to grasp it with a surgical clamp and take it back out the way it went in.
Why did he do that, you ask? He was preparing for a fisting party. Yes, preparing for a fisting party. He managed to perforate his colon and required a colostomy.
My favourite story will be familiar to anyone who has viewed my profile on fmylife.com. I got called to the ER to see a guy who had something "stuck up there". The nurses were all snickering about it when I arrived - "Did you hear about the guy in room 15?" I walked in to the room, and after I introduced myself, he said, "Doc, I'm not gay, but my wife is out of town with the kids, and I did a stupid thing." Yes he did - here is his Xray:
He told me that he figured there was a vacuum behind the bottle that wasn't allowing him to remove it himself, so he had used this bit to drill a hole in the bottom of another bottle. He then handed me the drill bit...and a spare bit, just in case the first one broke...as he expected me to drill a hole in the GLASS BOTTLE IN HIS RECTUM.
"Sir," I said, "I assure you I will not be drilling a hole in the bottle."
I took him to the operating room and put him to sleep, and when the muscle relaxants kicked in, his rectum and anus relaxed enough for me to get the bottle back out the way it went in. He signed himself out of the recovery room, and I never heard from him again.
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Homo sapiens are truly the most fascinating species on earth. ..ReplyDelete
isn't the first thing a butt plug? if it is, it's supposed to go there. although not deep enough to get out of reach. the flared out bottom part is supposed to stay out for removal.ReplyDelete
DocBastard- I love reading your posts on FML, and often wondered the story behind your profile pic... Now I know, lolReplyDelete
Ok, the drill bit I understand in a twisted sort of way. (Please tell me he at least had the good sense to use a glass bit rather than a general purpose one that would shatter the bottle. Nevermind. The good sense force is clearly not strong with him.)ReplyDelete
But the other bottle?
And the OTHER one? WTF?
If you're planning on drilling a bottle out of your ass, you probably want to practice first! My guess is he was going to drill it out himself and did a test but then couldn't see/reach well enough so went in to the Doc to have it done.ReplyDelete
I wonder what the relative risks of a general anaesthetic versus having a glass bottle drilled while embedded in your rectum actually are. I'm prepared to bet there are not to many controlled studies to tell us.
This story oddly satisfies my thirst for a worthy trauma surgeon story.ReplyDelete