But who the hell wants to read about someone who was in a minor car accident but was brought to me just as a precaution? Who wants to know about the old lady who loses her balance and bonks her head on an end table and ends up with nothing but a bump on the head and a mild concussion? Who cares about yet another drunk guy who falls off his bar stool, spends a couple of hours with me sobering up, and then endures a real sobering drive home with his wife appropriately yelling at him from the driver's seat? Is anyone even remotely interested in any of that?
I'm certainly not, but I have no choice in the matter. But I spare you good people the details about the mundane and boring people who come in with minor injuries, mainly because if I didn't you would all run away faster than teens from a Wiggles concert. No? Ok, faster than men from a Taylor Swift concert. Still no? Ok, faster than sane people from a Miley Cyrus concert.
Anyway, this next guy is not one of those boring people.
"He is a complete mess," I mentioned to one of the assistants. "But at least his head looks ok. But that's about the only thing that looks ok."
Unfortunately looks can be deceiving.
- 5th cervical vertebra fracture
- 5th thoracic vertebra fracture
- 5th lumbar vertebra fracture
- cervical spinal cord injury
- Sacrum fracture
- Open-book pelvic fracture
- Three rib fractures on the left
- Left hemopneumothorax (bleeding, punctured lung)
- Cardiac contusion
- Bilateral (both sides) severe lung contusion
- Bilateral scapula (shoulder blade) fractures
- Bilateral acetabulum (hip socket) fractures (left side shattered)
- Bilateral Grade IV (that's bad) kidney lacerations
- Urethra laceration
- Bladder laceration
- Mesentery (blood supply of small bowel) laceration
- Multiple small bowel and colon contusions
- Multiple deep left arm lacerations and abrasions
- Subdural haematoma (bleeding under the dura mater, the tough covering over the brain)