Monday 1 October 2018

No good deed

I'm sure you've all heard the phrase "No good deed goes unpunished". If you haven't, you really need to get out and/or read more. Seriously. Anyway, it is typically said in a sarcastic way after something bad happens after you've done something nice ("I raked my neighbourss leaves and then watched as they were strewn all over the yard by their obnoxious children"). Sometimes, however, the phrase can be taken literally.

Like with Ted (not his real name™).

Ted is an auto mechanic and the nice guy of the neighbourhood. Though he had a large beard and unkempt hair and generally looked like my usual Friday night assault victim, Ted was quiet, kind, and respectful, proving once again that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover (read: I shouldn't be an idiot and prejudge people based on their looks because I'm too often wrong).

Ted is the guy who would fix your blender if it stopped working, clean your gutters when they got clogged with leaves, and change your tyre while you were at work. You know, just because. He is a true Nice Guy, that one-in-a-million fellow that you hope to find next door when you move to a new house.

So when one of his neighbour's needed a new engine for his car, of course Ted volunteered not only to buy him a new engine at his cost, but also to install it for him at no charge. All he asked was for his neighbour to reimburse him the cost of the engine.

Apparently that wasn't good enough.

After the job was finished, Ted presented his neighbour with his now-functional car and asked him to pay him for the engine. Not for labour and not for his time (which would normally be approximately an arm and a leg), just for the engine. The neighbour bafflingly said no.

Ted was confused, as I think anyone in his right mind would be. Still being a Nice Guy, Ted asked again, nicely. The neighbour refused again (somewhat less-than-nicely) and stormed off.

Ted was still confused. Obviously.

The neighbour returned a short while later with several friends in tow. I have no idea what the neighbour could have possibly told them ("This fucking guy actually wants me to PAY for my new engine that he bought and then installed for me for free! What an asshole!"), but I suspect Ted was expecting him to be bringing payment.

Ha. No. The group of men proceeded to beat Ted half to death resulting in:

  • fractured mandible
  • seven fractured ribs
  • two punctured lungs
  • fractured nose
  • forehead laceration
  • knee laceration
  • ear laceration
Ted needed surgery for his mandible and bilateral chest tubes to reinflate his lungs, and he spent nearly two weeks in hospital recovering. But no matter how much pain he was in, regardless of the fact that he couldn't open his mouth after his jaw was wired shut, he always took the time to say "Thank you, Doc" and tell me how a great a job the nurses were doing.

Yes, Ted truly was a Nice Guy.

I saw him in my office a week or so later for follow up. The first thing he did was give me a bear hug (again, despite his broken ribs) to thank me for saving his life, which I didn't really do and tried to explain to him. He was never in a whole lot of danger of dying, though I suppose if I hadn't put in the chest tubes that was possible. Regardless, Ted looked great and was feeling great (relatively speaking), and though I didn't ask, that's when he told me the whole story of how he got hurt.

The neighbour is behind bars. The friends are behind bars. And Ted is back to being Ted, fixing refrigerators and painting fences. And just before leaving (and after giving me another bone-crushing hug), he said he would invite me to his house next time he brews up a batch of beer. And I absolutely believe he will.

And I believe I will take him up on that offer.

56 comments:

  1. Sometimes its good to just read about really nice people. Little less so when they had the ever living shit beaten out of them but still

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  2. Hooray, a kind-of-happy end!

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  3. If I was the judge sentencing the neighbor, I believe I would have seized the car, as well, plus requiring restitution for ALL of what it cost ted to fix it AND get beat up and put back together.
    and then tell ted to figure out somebody to give the car to.

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  4. The violent idiotic perpetrators are behind bars. I call that a very happy ending.

    Ted managed to keep on being a nice guy despite this madness, and I call that the best of all possible worlds. The Teds of this world should inherit the earth.

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  5. Though I do wonder (idly, as I'll never know for sure) what the neighbour's side of the story is. What could possibly have gone through his mind? Was it a gigantic misunderstanding (did he think he'd already paid Ted who was asking for more)? Was it malice? Was it some sort of those strange semi-territorial disputes to do with "respect", intimidation and other alpha-male crap? "Baffling" is right, people don't do things without a reason.

    Just wondering. Learning the other side of the story is what helps us prevent the story being reenacted in the future.

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    1. None of those reasons justify the treatment Ted received.

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    2. Indeed not, but the neighbour clearly thought otherwise. He thought he had to bring a crew of people to beat up the guy who had bought and installed him a new engine.

      This simply doesn't make sense. Unless the neighbour had an actual mental problem, this doesn't happen without a reason. The reason may be stupid, idiotic, all in the neighbour's head, but it has to be there. I'm just wondering what it was.

      You can chalk it up to curiosity, or a naïve desire to better understand how the world works so I can make it better. Or you can call it self-defence - if I'm ever in Ted's shoes, I want to be able to read the warning signs, if there are any!

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    3. I have a sneaking suspicion drugs were involved.

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    4. Entitlement. Drugs. Entitlement + booze. That's the way these things often get started.

      Wednesday

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    5. I have seen the sort of things people think are good ideas while under the influence of drugs. the harder the drugs, the less what they think is a good idea actually is.

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    6. Or just plain old stupidity. "There are two things in this world that are infinite- the universe, and human stupidity. And im not even so sure about the universe." -Albert Einstein

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  6. Unbelievable. I'm outraged but not surprised by the violence visited on poor Ted, but am puzzled as to how it escalated in the first place.
    There's doubtless a bit more to the story, but regardless, that type of violence was ludicrously unjustified.
    I'm glad Ted is doing well and am VERY glad you were the one to treat him. Enjoy that beer!!

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  8. Let me guess. The neighbor felt it was unfair since he or his could have gotten a car or engine for free so why should he pay Ted anything to fix it? By free I of course mean steal it.

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    1. Yes because we all want to learn SO MUCH about indias local news stories. Really.

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    2. make sure your virus protection is up to date if you click.

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    3. I'm guessing the delay in a new post from Doc may have to do with difficulties either tracking down or eliminating these people.

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    4. no, I think he is just suffering from a degree of burnout.

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  10. I could very easily hijack this blog.

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    1. If you actually knew the difference between an ADN and a BSN, you'd know that it doesn't matter a whiff when it comes to patient care. That's coming from a BSN-educated nurse, btw. And that's hardly scratching the surface of the idiocy in your post.

      Away with you, ambulance chaser.

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    2. so... does that mean I'm wasting my time if I call him when I need a patient to die from medical negligence?

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    1. shall we now discuss the education of an LPN and what they are qualified and not qualified to do. and then we can talk about how an education from google U compares to Timbuktu Africa.

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    2. Well, nursing used to be a man's job until women started sticking their noses into ther people's profession. The whole thing started in Liberal California. Women have been entering male-dominated fields for decades, but it’s less common for a predominantly female occupation to have a substantial increase in its share of men. Yet the jobs that are shrinking tend to be male ones now, and those that are growing are mostly female. I think women still make the best turkey though.

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    3. and this has what to do with your delusions of competence?

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    4. My dear Watson, when you have 17 states giving nurses the right to practice primary care medicine without physician oversight is very worrisome. That alone scares me to death. Are you not worried? There is a primary care crisis. We do need more primary care providers. Though nurses can fulfill some of the demand they cannot do so without doctor oversight. It boils down to training. But some nurses just don't have the necessary brain cells to cut it in critical care or primary care. That's the bottom line.

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    5. and you just keep running further and further off the reservation, there, johnny boy.

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    7. and a hundred, eighty-five died of the flu in the 2017 - 2018 season.

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    8. And anyone who would die from the flu shot itself would more than likely be due to an allergy. Which is obscenely rare.
      Lets look at the amount of people who die from bee or peanut butter allergies for comparison....100 for bees, and up to 200 for peanuts every year.
      So guess we should ban bees and peanuts forever!

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    9. Also the somewhat rise in death count for this past flu season is due to so many people NOT GETTING THEIR FUCKING SHOTS AND DYING FROM THE FLU.

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    10. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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    11. Well guess ill just wait around for me to get polio, measels, and for small pox to come back (other viruses can potentially mutate into small pox due to the unpredictability of viruses)
      Even if ANYTHING you wrote were true, the potential death toll from vaccines is so impossibly small as to be unimportant, especially compared to the death tolls of the deadliest diseases on the planet. Like the flu( depending on the strain) The spanish influenza killed more people than the ongoing war did. What war was that? WORLD WAR ONE. Small pox was the deadliest disease on the planet.
      Its now gone thanks to vaccines. Because the last carriers were cured and vaccinated against it.
      Note: the last guy to have small pox was cured in 1978, and didnt die until 2013! Of a different disease! (Measels, while in a third world country helping distribute polio vaccines)
      The people who get sick from flu shots are such a small percentage its ridiculous. So fuck off, especially since exactly 0 people believe you are a lawyer, Mr Google U Print Out Degree.
      Also great job at getting people to contact you when you post anonymously

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    12. The very fact that you cannot get unbiased FACTS about vaccines from doctors and nurses is enough to make anyone suspicious. Never mind all the other evidence to suggest that there is a real risk from vaccines. NO ONE can state that vaccines are safe and effective. The evidence simply isn't there. That a young mother can take her 8 week old baby in to a doctor's office and be told as much without being given a balanced view is so very wrong. Too much profit for big Pharma - it's not in their interest to tell the truth. Lie some more. Woot! Woot!

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    13. Oh no the lizard people and the illyminati are behind it all as well! Eun before they get you for spouting "the truth"

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    14. Big pharmaceutical companies (or Big Pharma) should be considered evil because they do not actually try to help consumers. If pharmaceutical companies actually help people, they wouldn't make as much money. Instead, these companies, such as Pfizer, are interested in developing medications that may treat symptoms but not actual cures or they develop medications to treat side effects of their other drugs. If you take a look at any medication advertisement, listen to the side effects. Many times the side effects are worse than the actual problem. This is why many people have decided to not go through Big Pharma and would rather use alternative treatments, which have no side effects and are all natural. BTW, nurses are the Big Peddlers of Big Pharma.

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    15. I see the stupid didn't go away during my vacation.

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  13. It's nice to read about patients who have a good attitude (despite the circumstances that led the gentlemen to the hospital). I hope you get to try that beer though!

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    1. Doc doesn't drink beer. I don't think he's man enough. Not good for his hand of silk. Sigh.

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    2. yes, he does. he's mentioned it. but you never did get back to us on the canned corn vs frozen corn question.

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    3. I don't think this is John. Similarities: Troll. Differences: Disrespectful Anal Oriface.

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    4. I don't know. chip on his shoulder, hates doc, full of himself, pretty much wrong about everything...

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    5. Pretty much? But when has john been right about anything to begin with? I think youre giving him a little to much credit

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    6. a broken clock is right twice a day. unless its digital, then it's just once. unless it uses LED or LCD display. then it's pretty much useless.

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    7. I think Doc is doing his own sex change surgery performed on himself. Be patient. He's almost done. Just a little bit more estrogen and he'll change his name from Doc Bastard to Doc Boobsy.

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  14. Hey Doc! Are you ever going to post again? Are you too busy saving lives to write about it? Sure miss reading about your daily adventures in humanity.

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  15. I hope everything is ok with him!

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    1. Just summarize it all as "big pharma and science scary rawr fear mongering killer tomatoes" and youll get the same message across.

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  18. You must be getting paid by a drug company since you removed my last comment so fast.

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